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Day 14 – Love Takes Delight February 4, 2010

Posted by poetiscian in love.
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No matter how much you tell yourself – it just seems that you are no longer in love with your spouse.  He simply can’t do anything right as far as you are concerned.  You’ve tussled with the idea for the last couple of months and it has just come down to the simple fact, the love is gone. You hate the way she nit-picks you about the smallest inconsequential things. The last argument was too much and after much consideration, you’ve decided that you no longer want them as a best friend.  In these situations, someone has determined that a relationship divorce is the clearest choice. Where is the delight?

Mama said “there would be days like this” and she was right.  But I am here to tell you that Father said, “stand firm on your obligation to love and honor one another” and he too was right. It is a shame that we discard relationships so easily.  Toss in the towel when things are not going our way. Just up and abandon the person, the dreams and most importantly the commitment to love the person for life. Sometimes for something that could have easily been resolved if you both sat down and communicated.  It was a choice to be together, so you should want to honor that choice by sticking by your partner.

Start by remembering why you were first delighted to have the person in your life. Choose to think about the positive attributes of your wife. Focus on what made you love him in the first place. Stop criticizing one another and start being more patient with one another’s faults.  We are all flawed in the sight of our Lord and Master.

Today you have a real chance to change your behavior – choose to be delighted by the people whom you love.  Don’t just throw away a relationship and blame it on the other person.  Take ownership of your own emotions and live up to your responsibilities – for it takes two to really want to be one!

A few critical thoughts:
Have a radical change of heart. Make the decision to delight in your spouse no matter how long you have been in the relationship. Welcome your partner back into your heart.

Biblical Verse(s):
Ecclesiastes 9:9 – Enjoy life with the wife you love all the days of your fleeting life.
Proverbs 23:26 – My son, give me your heart and let your eyes keep to my ways…

Resources: The Love Dare by Stephen Kendrick and Alex Kendrick
Online Blogger: The Power of our Beliefs by Robin Easton

Purposefully neglect an activity you would normally do so you can spend quality time with your spouse. Do something he or she would love to do or a project they’d really like to work on. Just be together.

Q: Is it hard to let down your guard and let those back into our lives that have disappointed us?

Have a blessed day, I love you!


Jack and Jill From my Perspective… January 24, 2010

Posted by poetiscian in love, Reflection.
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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water, Jack fell down and broke his crown and Jill came tumbling after.  It is amazing how a simple grammar school rhyme can have such an eloquently hidden message.  If only the true meaning associated with Jack and Jill was discovered during adolescence. This is a rhyme about relationships…

No matter if you replace Jack with Jennifer or Jill with John, or leave as is – the message is still the same.  When one partner falls in a relationship, the other is sure to follow.  How did I get that from such a simple school yard chant? Let us analyze this together.

The two are a couple in a relationship of some sort and they start off together, thus Jack and Jill went. The hill is synonymous for everyday life occurences – bills, the kids, the job, in-laws and the list goes on, up a hill.  They are doing what it takes to keep up their household, to fetch a pail of water. One person in the relationship looses their balance – laid off, sickness, family crisis, and such, Jack fell down.  Whatever the material thing that was in his possession is now lost, destroyed, fractured and/or broken, and broke his crown. During this time of crisis, the partner that was following closely also is caught up in the landslide, and finally, and Jill came tumbling afterwards

Whatever happened to the happy couple that started up the hill of life together, merrily swinging their pail?  Did they get up and brush themselves off and regroup to head back up that hill to successfully get that water?  Is Jack still in search of his broken crown and thus had to abandon his relationship?  Maybe Jill climbed that hill by herself only to discover that no water even existed at the top.

I want to believe that Jack and Jill landed at the bottom and realized that they forgot to take the Holy Spirit with them on their journey.  They landed at the bottom on their knees and together they prayed for the right foot holes to make it back to the top of that hill.  They tossed the Bible in the pail so that when they were weak, they could read about how He is a provider during the midnight.  I want to believe that the couple made it back up that hill and once at the top they witnessed another who had also traveled the steep hillside.  There was Boo Peep helping Jesus attend his sheep for she too had some challenges in which she overcame.

I found a Jack and a couple of Jills’ who concurred to the testimony of love during our first five days of the Dare to Love Challenge.

Love is Patient:
Relationships only work and have longevity when one becomes disciplined and mature enough to take SELF out of the center. “Patrick”

Love Shows Kindness:
Sometimes the very people who are not kind to us, are the very people that we need to release from our inner circle. “Poetiscian”

Love is not Selfish:
I was being selfish to my own dreams…As woman we sometimes fail to see how much we sacrifice ourselves for many things. “California”

Love is Thoughtful:
I’ve resolved to say If someone can’t treat you right,love you back, and see your worth LET IT GO. “Walking on Faith”

Love is not Rude:
I really enjoy reading your words of wisdom and encouragement. “Shae”

I hope you are enjoying a very blessed Sunday and that you are keeping our Lord constant in all that you do and say!  I look forward to blogging with you tomorrow as we continue our 40-Day Challenge by Daring to Love.

I love You (unconditionally).

Day Two – Love Shows Kindness January 19, 2010

Posted by poetiscian in Kindness, Patience.
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How often are we just mean and don’t really take each others feelings into consideration.  We say things that we should not say and do things that we simply know are not out of love?  If I am honest, I can admit it is more than it should be.  I was recently hospitalized for a few days due to surgery.  Initially I was very scared and almost canceled the surgery because I felt that I was alone.  However, when you have God in your life, you are never alone.  He is a provider in the midnight hour, and He never sleeps.  So, my prayer partner met me at the hospital.  She took off a day after being off for two-weeks to sit and talk and pray and dance and laugh and just be – just be with me.  This was an act of kindness.  She had nothing to gain.  Out of her love for me, it sparked her to act in a kindly manner.  I didn’t realize how many branches my tree has until I came out of surgery.  My mother, daughters, cousins and friends showed up and allowed God to show out in my life.  People have been sweeping in and out to assist in my recovery and although I am “single” I still do have a multitude of healthy relationships.  I recognize that the Higher Being has to be a part of every single task that I perform in life.  If I let go and let God, He will direct my path and hold my hand.  Are there instances where you did not act in a kind manner, when it would have cost you nothing?  How about a time when you acted out of kindness and yet felt it go unnoticed?  That does happen too…

A few critical thoughts:
Kindness is how love acts. Kindness creates a blessing.  When you are kind, people want to be around you. Kindness is gentle (be careful how you treat folks), helpful (when a husband steps up to assist his wife without being asked), willing (listening first), and finally kindness takes initiative (greeting first, forgiving first, taking the first step) in order to demonstrate love.

Biblical Verse(s):
Proverbs 3:3-4

Say nothing negative and do one act of kindness today.

Q: How harsh are you – honestly, and more importantly what are you going to do about it???

Have a blessed day, I love you!