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Day Seven – Love Believes the Best January 26, 2010

Posted by poetiscian in love.
Tags: , , ,

You may as well get your non-fat mocha latte, or your black with only sugar coffee, or your diet coke, or bottled water cause I got a lot to say on this subject…

I need to know – is there a room in your house that is locked and you only visit it during times of pressure, depression, frustration and/or confrontation?  The room that you sneak off to when you don’t think anyone is looking.  You know what I’m talking about, the room of under-appreciation.  When things simply are not going your way in the relationship, you hide-away in this room where you have written awful things about the people who you love.  In this room you reflect on what an awful husband you have because he does not appreciate you.  You are able to sit in your high and mighty chair and review the many failures of your wife.  Here in this comfortable place you are able to clearly see the weaknesses of all of your friends.  Now you know the room that I am referencing, sure you do – we all have one that we retreat to during times of turmoil, heartache and hurt.

Maybe it is time that we relabeled and remodeled that room.  Pull down those drab curtains and put up some new mini-blinds in an extra bright color to match the sun.  Lets call this the appreciation room – where we spend time remembering and cultivating only positive thoughts about people whom we are sharing relationships. When your mate does hateful things, instead of retaliating with harmful words, show them love.  Don’t allow their bitterness to overtake the love that you know they share for you – even if they are not exhibiting it at that time.  It is emotional fallout that destroys relationships and consequently ends marriages.  After years of being together, this is not how you really want the relationship to end, therefore, you must sit in this room when things are a bit rocky on the outside.

Realize that we all fail at some point and that it is not love when we devalue those that we love. It is only our selfish pride that insists we are not at fault and that everything we do is good, honest and upstanding. Don’t be a hypocrite and say you love a person, but then rush to the “depreciation room” every time you are confronted with a negative situation and then bad mouth your spouse.  No one is perfect except God!  Today you can start thinking differently about how you show respect for your spouse.  Choose today to not put all of your relationships under a microscope and pick out only the negative aspects.  Love can believe the best all that it wants, it is up to you to put those words into action!

A few critical thoughts:
Love focuses on the positive.  You are able to reign in your negative thoughts and to let love lead those thoughts.  If you visit the depreciation room – write the word love on its wall. Meditate on positive thoughts.

Biblical Verse(s):
I Corinthians 13:7 – Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

Resources: The Love Dare by Stephen Kendrick and Alex Kendrick

For today’s dare, get two sheets of paper. On the first one, spend a few minutes writing out positive things about your spouse. Then do the same with negative things on the second sheet.

Q: How do you cope with people in your relationships who continue to downplay their own negative behavior?  Are you this person and if so, what can you do differently now that you know better?

Have a blessed day, I love you!



1. Darentiz - January 26, 2010

After completing your challenge, I know how really blessed I am to have my relationship. Don’t get me wrong, we have our ups and downs but the ups well excede the downs. There was a time I wondered if situation that would make me walk away from this relationship. After much consideration I couldn’t think of anything. There was a time I would leave a relationship in a heartbeat. Squeeze the toothpaste in the middle..I’m gone. Raise your voice..I’m out! Have an affair and it is oooover. I didn’t consider the best things in my partners. Today I DO! ANY situation that arises in my relationship will be handled with love. I believe the best in my partner and she in me. Our belief in each other and God will help us get through anything..even infidelity! I hope I never have to test this…lol. Sista’s can be complicated!!!

poetiscian - January 26, 2010

Come on now – squeezing the toothpaste is the middle is definitely grounds for divorce!!!

Learning how to handle all of my situations with love. I don’t get the star today, but there’s tomorrow, for I will make another fruitful attempt. Damn devil know he can be busy when the mind is idle.

Pray my strength…

Darentiz - January 26, 2010

The devil is busy but GOD is diligent! Tomorrow is coming sooner than you think.

In prayer

2. Shawn - January 27, 2010

OMG!!!! Blondie, I just had this talk with Tonya two days ago, about not feeling appreciated by someone, and what to do. I don’t have a room that I go to I just cut my phone off and go shopping (buying unnecessary junk I don’t need). Me not being married and just dating trying to find that right one, is hard. So the first thing if you do anything I don’t like or I feel unappreciated….you out the door. I was told I was being to hard on them and I don’t give people a chance. But I feel I don’t want to settle for less and I deserve the best. At the end when its all said and done you just want to feel appreciated!

Darentiz - January 27, 2010

Never settle for less and you will get the best. When you receive the best, believe the best

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